Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Five Annoying Things People Say to Parents of Multiples

As parents to now 4 year old, fraternal twin boys, we have heard more than our fair share of annoying and quite frankly stupid questions and comments about our twins. The ridiculous things that come out of other people's mouths will never cease to amaze me. This is just a sampling of a few that I find super annoying. Please don't say any of these to a parent of multiples.

Our twins the day they were born.

"Are they natural?"
As opposed to what - artificial? Do they look plastic to you? Yes they are 100% natural, Grade A, organic human beings. Maybe I should get them shirts with nutrition labels on them.

"Did you have a vaginal birth or a c-section?"
Seriously people? This is what you ask a complete stranger? Would you like to check me for an episiotomy scar or c-section scar as well? When I tell them I had both (I truly did), that really makes them gasp.

"Are they identical?"
This wouldn't be so annoying if my boys didn't look absolutely nothing a like. One has slightly darker skin and dark brown hair while the other has fair skin and auburn-ish hair. Not to mention their faces are completely different. Do you not know what the word identical means? Apparently parents of boy/girl twins get this question a lot too. That boggles my mind.

"I have two children close in age so I know JUST what its like to have twins!"
The heck you do!! Your kids are at least nine months apart and most likely more. There is absolutely no comparing that to having twins. If you don't believe me, we can trade places for a day and then you can tell me if you still think its the same.

"You sure have your hands full! How do you do it?"
Why thank you for pointing that out. I hadn't noticed that I have my hands full. How do I do it? Beats the heck out of me! I figure as long as we all survive the day then I am doing good.

And of course, all of these comments are first prefaced by the "Are they twins?" question. Which by itself really isn't so horrible - but it always leads to more questions. So once I answer that one I try to get away as quickly as I can to avoid the rest of these.

Are you a parent of multiples? What really annoying things have people said to you or asked you?


  1. I am a twin, and the number one question we get is "have you ever traded places?". Well, it's just boring because no one could tell if we did or not! Haha. Good luck- I hope your boys grow up best friends like we did :)

  2. That would be so frustrating! People are so intrusive sometimes.

  3. I used to get the "Are they yours?" question a lot, because my kids are biracial. I feel your pain in a not exactly the same way way. It's annoying!

  4. I can't believe the rude things people say sometimes!

  5. It's like all etiquette goes out the window when a woman becomes pregnant. I mean...strangers walk up, touch her stomach (later touch her kids), ask beyond personal questions, etc. It's so weird!!!

  6. I hate the "are they natural" question. That's basically asking "did you have sex to produce these kids?" RUDE!

  7. So funny, I wrote a version of this the other day. I guess silly questions are everywhere. I love the "are they natural" line. Social filter I'm telling you, I should devise one and market it.

  8. I'm not a parent to multiples, but I have a friend that has twins and another than has triplets. They both talk about the crazy things people say to them.

  9. That's funny, some people just don't think. I'll admit I'd be curious if twins were a vaginal delivery but I'd never outright ask.

  10. The things people ask! It can be pretty daunting! I never understood those types of things. My children are 3 years apart, but look IDENTICAL.. I love when people ask "Are they siblings?" I mean what gave it away, the fact they are the same child only one is a bit taller/shorter?! LOL

  11. I have 3 month old identical girls - "Does twins run in your family?" is the most common question I've gotten. Then I feel obligated to explain that identical twins are completely random and only fraternal twins can be hereditary if on the moms side. Or I just say "No." :)

  12. Who asks these questions?! Geez. People have no boundries!

  13. We have a group for parents of multiples and this topic came up today. It is sometimes difficult to be polite to people that are completely rude.


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